urbanfuck:

urbanfuck:

urbanfuck:

anal sneezes are cute as shit

sorry iphone the word i was looking for was “animal” sneezes better luck next time

this is not what i want to be remembered for

titus-androgynous:

lalondes:

youknowtheres-oil-intheice:

lalondes:

when u Dad com home and make hte spagheti because he doesn’t believe in patriarchal misogynistic gender norms which confer food preparation responsibilities solely on women

How can you spell “patriarchal misogynistic gender norms” But not “Your” “Come” “The” and “Spaghetti” 

your come, the spaghetti

youronlinegirlfriend:

roses are red

anon hate is rude

i can’t write poems

send me a nude

deathpup:

shrexything:

babyferaligator:

oomshi:

is masturbating while smoking weed called masturblazing 

no its called highjacking

guys no it’s weedwhacking

no its called dissapointing ur mother

menstruate:

red white and blue are the colors of freedom until they’re flashing in your rearview mirror

tickettoheaven:

chafing-nipples:

dangermat:

when bananas rot they secrete stuff that makes other fruit including bananas near them rot faster
that’s so fucked up that is murder suicide
bananas commit murder suicide

that’s pretty fucking metal

I’d say it’s pretty fucking

bananas

mermaidsandmisandry:

things i dont need in my life:

• wasps
• those stringy things on the banana
• commercials on youtube

(Source: misandrywhale)